ABOUT BRAND

Every initiative starts with a story, need, desire, or a life experience.  Everything began in 2005.  Maybe you are expecting this to be a simple touching story of a wonderful encounter that set me on this path. That was not my experience. It all started with a terrible incident.

So, there I was, 35, a single mother, making good money as a Realtor and part-time intuitive, paying all my bills, enjoying the simple pleasures of life. Life was good! I had just taken my son and his cousin on a trip to Europe and NY. I was expecting to return home, and to my routine of cooking my son dinners, work,  spend time with my beautiful family and relax with my “invisible” friends. But my soul had a different plan for me. 

What happened?  A huge and unfair judgment had just been awarded against me. I was surprised to see that piece of paper in the mail, because I had not even shown up in court even once to defend my case. I had not even been informed about being sued.

Just like that, my life as I knew it flipped upside down. But why? My car insurance company did not pay damages for a car accident that I had 4 years prior, exactly on 9/11.  The Universe has a very weird sense of humor! Who would have thought that the fall of The Towers will be linked in such a direct way to my own “Tower” moment?

I went from being a worry-free single mom to losing my driving privileges. Imagine a Realtor without the ability to drive and no Uber in sight?!   My income took a hit, or several.

“How could you do this to me God? What have I done wrong?” These questions screamed from my brain and I questioned everything around me, especially a decade of serving God and being on the spiritual path and personal development.

I was devastated by it, even though this was not my “first crisis”.

My lawyer said I could not touch a car’s wheel for at least six months. I was shocked beyond words. I kept wondering:  “How is it fair for a single mother to go through such brutal consequences of something that is not even her fault?” I had all the questions in the world but not a single answer would bring me any comfort. Even psychic insights wouldn’t!

Days passed by and the pain kept growing, turning into high anxiety so debilitating that I found myself sobbing uncontrollably the second I woke up. Can you imagine waking up and instantly starting to cry, from April until September, without knowing why or how to stop it?  The anguish was worse than ever seeing that I have one more problem – inability to function, on top of the primary one – inability to work.  They didn’t joke around, misery breeds company!

I had enough problems already, so I wanted the crying to stop. Hence, I sought help where I figured I’d find it: healers, hypnotists, shamans, Tantra masters, and even Christ Consciousness Teachers. I hit a brick wall each time. I was going broke but help seemed elusive. I was in an inverse relationship with my pain: the more I attempted to stop the crying, the more problems were coming. Who would have thought that over 10K “offering” won’t bribe crying?

This is when I decided to take my journey of self-discovery, towards “professional knowledge”. I knew that just a few certifications in healing arts was not the same as being an expert. I figured that if I became proficient, I wouldn’t have to depend on anyone. In two years, I got certified in 4 new modalities. Since then, I’ve read obsessively a minimum of 14-20 per month on topics of soul, spirituality, mind, mindfulness, spiritual laws, personal improvement, parapsychology, etc., and took course after course.

Things started to improve but problems were not gone.  While my credit score hit 500, I lost my home and my car, but, I kept the reading mania at the forefront of my life, and got more healing modalities certifications coming. I was haunted by the thought that my son could be in a similar situation in the future and I’ll be unable to help him. This is when I declared to myself: “I will not stop until I am free of suffering.”

While the average person had 5-year plans filled with things like acquiring a new property, buying a new car, snagging a good husband, blissful sex, a dog, or even a new PJ or eating a pretzel, mine was: “I overcome my limitations, especially the ones I’ve given to my son through DNA”.

I was so determined to achieve this new ambition that I called it, my “mono goal”. It was my bargaining point, however funny that sounded. “C’mon God, it’s ONE wish only for my entire life,” I begged.

I was even more determined – who I am kidding, more like compulsive – and laser-focused on discovering “the hows” and “the why nots”, the Eureka of someone in crisis. 

And then, boom, “The Secret” by Rhonda Byrne was released.  I scoured the internet to get my hands on that book. When I held it, I was overjoyed, but only for a moment. While the whole world – it looked that way – rejoiced and was hopeful, I was pissed off, as the book brushed over its most important teachings. Even more annoying, the much-touted “secret” was not included. For a while, I lost hope. I stopped reading and getting more certifications, and accepted that my path is a difficult one. At the same time, I busied myself warding off mean-spirited opinions about my material possession from some “friends”.

One day, I woke up and had valuable answers from my soul not my mind, and some of my “why nots” were sorted. Just like that!